Earlier this year, I read a book titled “The Silver Lining: A Supportive and Insightful Guide to Breast Cancer” by Hollye Jacobs. Throughout the book, Hollye discusses the importance of finding silver linings, and remaining optimistic in even the most difficult times (for her, it was a breast cancer diagnosis, surgery, chemotherapy, etc.). Hollye says “finding silver linings was essential to my well-being… They kept my spirits hopeful, and they gave me the balance and perspective to get me through the darkest of days.” Here’s an example of how it’s used. A major part of fertility testing/treatment requires “morning monitoring” which consists of frequent doctor visits for blood work and ultrasound. The goal of this is to monitor hormone levels, ovulation, etc. and allow the doctor to make any necessary adjustments to medications or treatment protocol. It’s also done to help avoid potential risks such as cysts or multiple pregnancies (too many eggs). About 2 weeks every month, I wake up at 5:50am and drive 45 minutes to the doctor’s office (that’s the only place my insurance covers). It’s dark. It’s cold. I’m tired. What silver lining is there in that? If you look hard enough, you can find many in this one scenario.
1. There is medicine and treatment available for infertility
2. I have a car, I can pay for gas, and I have NASH 94.7 country music to
keep me company on the ride
3. I can catch up on the morning news in the waiting room
4. I'm awake early enough to text with my niece before school
5. I'm surrounded by hundreds of women and men experiencing similar
issues and I'm reminded how common this is
6. I have time to brainstorm new blog ideas
7. I no longer faint when giving blood
8. Thank G-d, I have health insurance. And that insurance covers some of
my testing and treatments (because many insurance don't cover any
expenses related to fertility)
9. There's a drive-thru Dunkin Donuts on my way from the doctor to work
10. The ultimate silver lining is that this journey has led me here...to try and
make it better, easier, and more comforting for those who join me, or
may follow me, down this path
Did you catch what just happened? I just went from being cranky to being grateful. It isn’t always easy to do, I’ll tell you that. The truth is, silver linings don’t erase the challenges we go through. It doesn’t take away things like injections and failed pregnancy tests but they do provide a flicker of hope. And although it can take a great deal of effort to find them, silver linings are always there. You just have to choose to look for them, and choose to be positive and optimistic, even when the cards are stacked against you. I give you all the task of trying to find silver linings and blessings in your daily life and in your most challenging times.
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